I had my bridal shower on Sunday, and it was amazing! My mom is incredibly creative, and put everything together with so much love (and the help of my wonderful bridesmaids). Two of my aunts came from out of state to be there, and I was surrounded my friends and family who love and care about me. I got a lot of really awesome presents, too! I had a great time, and was reminded just how lucky and blessed I am…but, something was missing. Actually, two someones: my grandmas. So, I wanted to write a little about them and how awesome they were so they know that they haven’t been forgotten.
My dad’s mom was named Ruth, but I called her Nana. She was very sweet, but definitely a tough cookie too. Nana loved to volunteer, and she was very active at her synagogue, especially in Sisterhood. She received awards and recognition for the work she did there and was known by many. Nana was also an avid card player, and would often host gatherings at her house. Two of the things I admired most about her were her strength and independence. When my grandpa passed away in 2002, she was sad, but she didn’t let his death stop her from living her life. It wasn’t like she didn’t miss him, but she understood that he would have wanted her to keep on living and doing the things she loved. Nana wasn’t an overly emotional person, but I knew she loved me very much. She passed away suddenly while visiting family in 2004. My dad was on his way back from seeing her when it happened, and he found out when his plane landed back home. It was right before Mother’s Day and I had made Nana a card for the first time since I was little. I know she would have loved all of this wedding stuff. She would sit there quietly with a hint of a smile on her face, but inside she’d be gushing with happiness and pride. I can picture her at the wedding in a cute little skirt suit with a pin on the lapel.
My mom’s mom Eleanor was my Gawa. Somehow, that’s what I got from the word ‘grandma,’ and it stuck. She was outgoing and funny, and she had a unique fashion sense. Gawa loved soap operas and going to the beach. She always enjoyed doing girly things with me and my mom, the only girls in the family (my mom has two brothers who each have two sons), and we took many shopping trips together, including buying my Bat Mitzvah and prom dresses. My Gawa had a huge heart and was incredibly friendly. It was always amusing to go out with her and see how many conversations she would have with random people. Gawa was incredibly fun and vibrant, that’s what made it especially hard when she got dementia. Slowly, we watched that vibrancy disappear, crossing our fingers every time we went to visit that she would remember who we were. Gawa passed away in the summer of 2008, but we’d lost her a few months before. The real Gawa, before the dementia, would have wanted to be involved in as much of the wedding planning as possible. I know she would have loved going dress shopping and talking about all of the details. She would have worn some funky ensemble with beads and some sort of artsy clip-on earrings. Gawa would have been absolutely glowing, and she definitely would have cried through the whole ceremony.
My grandmas weren’t at my shower, and they won’t be physically there on my wedding day, but they will definitely be in my heart. I will also have a pin from each of them attached to my bouquet, and their pictures will be displayed along with my grandpa, Rob’s grandparents, and my friend Max on a special memorial table. Don’t get me wrong, I had such a fantastic time at my shower, and I know the wedding will be absolutely beautiful, but I can’t help wishing I could have shared it all with these two special ladies. Nana and Gawa, I miss you both and I hope you’re in a peaceful place watching down on me with a smile.
Cherish the time you have with the ones you love. Don’t take a single day for granted. When they’re gone, try and remember the happy times you shared and the memories you made. That’s what they would want for you.
