I love this post, Sam, and I couldn't wait to comment because there's so much that I have to say in reply to it. So beware: another long, rambling comment…

This is actually why I said in my latest post that I was becoming frustrated and discouraged by blogging, why I was wondering if it was worth it. This is why in our recent conversation I told you about all of the insecurities I was feeling then. Speaking of the blogging community in my own case, at it's best, it's everything you want it to be — people are warm and open and welcoming, they are supportive and caring like no other community I've ever known. At it's worst, it can be petty and competitive and cliquish and that is a prime ingredient for jealousy. But I think how you react to it plays such a large part.

You don't have to play that game.

For awhile, I got caught up in that competition, I admit. I saw people connecting — and not just connecting, but practically worshiping — and I wondered if I was missing something, couldn't understand it; I saw blog posts that got dozens upon dozens of comments for a string of profanities or a two line post and I wondered if maybe I was doing something wrong. Self-doubt invaded every space of me, only to be nudged out by that green-eyed monster.

But something I realized in the past week made that monster retreat: That's them. That's not me. I know myself now well enough to know what matters, to keep doing what I'm doing; I don't *want* to play that game. So I began to wonder: why should I be jealous of something that I know I wouldn't want to take part in in the first place? Why would I make myself feel bad, feel worse? Why expend such energy when you can use that energy on what and who really matters to you.

Jealousy is a funny thing — it brings out the worst in people but, really, it shows you what you believe you're lacking. “Believe” is the word here. It's all about perspective. What you might be jealous of could be another's insecurities; what you might be jealous of could be your own self-doubt. I know that this was unfortunately the case with me.

As I wrote on Twitter a few weeks ago: If you would only realize what an impact you have on others just by being you, you wouldn't ever want to be anyone else.

That little guy is persistent. And he likes to spread poison and leave you bitter and empty. But the less power you give him, the less power he has. Good for you for shutting him up, Sam. I think the people who matter will always matter and the rest will fall to the wayside. Believe in yourself, and have faith that those who love you will never let you be alone again.