A couple of months ago, I wrote a post where I set a goal to become a better version of myself by my 24th birthday. More specifically, I said, “I resolve to be more confident by the time by birthday rolls around at the end of August.” Well, my birthday has come and gone, and I am proud to say that I accomplished that goal. For me, feeling confident is an ongoing process, and I still have a long way to go, but I’ve definitely made significant progress. Since July, I’ve been taking a closer look at how I view myself, and what causes me to think that way. I read a fantastic book called, What’s Holding You Back by Sam Horn, and it helped me figure out better ways to deal with things. If you feel like something’s holding you back, I definitely recommend it.
I’m a giver by nature. I like to do nice things for others, take care of people and make them smile. I preach the importance of appreciation. But, one thing I didn’t realize is that while I’ve been so busy giving, caring, and appreciating others, I haven’t been doing those things enough for myself. I do my best to be there for people when they need me, but I’ve always been hesitant to ask them to be there for me.
Well, not anymore. I started small, well…kind of small, by planning a little birthday get together for myself. I found a bar that had a good space to hang out and great drink specials, invited my friends, and ordered ridiculously yummy cupcakes. Most importantly, I promised myself that I was going to have an awesome time with my friends. I wasn’t going to think about anything sad or scary or frustrating. I did whatever I needed to do to feel beautiful and confident that night, (bought a new outfit, gave in and got a spray tan), and I’m happy to say that it worked. I had an amazing night, and was so happy that so many friends came out to celebrate with me. I know that I’m worth it, and that sometimes I have to take a step back from work, family, and friends, and do something for me.
Although I was hesitant to say that I’m the best version of myself, I think I’m the best version of myself that I can be right now. Life isn’t perfect, far from it, and there are still times when I don’t feel so good about myself. But, now when I walk down the street and see someone look at me, I think that I must look cute today, instead of worrying that I’m walking awkwardly or making a weird face. As silly as it sounds, that is a big step in the right direction.
Life is all about balance. Work hard and play hard. Give and take. Be selfless, but realize its okay to be selfish sometimes too. Act serious and goofy. Laugh and cry. Become the best version of yourself.
