#reverb10 Day 13–Prompt: Action. When it comes to aspirations, its not about ideas. It’s about making ideas happen. What’s your next step?

In May 2009, I started on a mission of appreciation in memory of my friend Max, who had passed away at age 21 the previous summer. When I got the news that he was gone, one of the first things that came to my mind was when I had last told him how much he meant to me, and how grateful I was to have him as a friend…and I couldn’t remember. I promised myself right then and there that I wouldn’t have a moment like that ever again. But, that wasn’t enough. I wanted to remind other people to be grateful for the people and things they are lucky enough to have in their lives, not to mention our lives themselves. Gratitude and appreciation are not just for special days and occasions, they should be a part of every single day.

So, I started the Appreciation Revolution. I recruited 31 of my fellow bloggers and friends to write about appreciation, and they came up with some incredibly inspiring posts. The series was very well received, and got a lot of RT and Facebook love. I even turned the first half into an e-book. But, here’s the thing…I want it to be more. This prompt is about taking action, and I want to make things happen, but I’m not sure what my next step should be. Part of me wants to get bumper stickers and t-shirts designed with reminders of appreciation, create a snazzy blog graphic for sidebars, start a separate Twitter account, and commit more to the Facebook page…or turn the whole darn thing into a book. I have the passion and the excitement, but I don’t know the best way to take action.

Here’s where I ask for your help. How do I recruit more people to become part of the Appreciation Revolution and spread my message of gratitude to the world?

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“Enjoy the little things, for one day you may look back and realize they were the big things.” – Robert Brault

In August 2009, I started a Gratitude Journal. I’ve always been able to appreciate the little things in life. So, writing a daily entry in a Gratitude Journal seemed like it would be an effortless task. Although I soon realized that the hard part wasn’t finding something to be grateful for, but rather finding 5 minutes at the end of each day to devote to writing about it.

Not long ago, I was caught writing in that little, black Moleskine. And while I hidden my written words from prying eyes, I did make a verbal confession outloud. With a big, stupid grin on my face I proclaimed…

Me: I think I may be falling in love.

My Sister: Ha. Really? How do you know that?

Me: Because she always asks how my day was.

I know. It’s ridiculous. Falling in love with someone because they ask how your day was? To everyone else it’s called “engaging in light conversation.” It’s a simple question, a polite gesture. But to me, it was extremely rare, and meant the world! It sounds bizarre, and probably quite sad, but until recently, I’ve never had a girl ask me how my day was. Never! I just don’t think they ever cared enough to ask, or had any genuine interest in hearing the answer.

Perhaps this is my own fault. In the past, I’ve constantly gotten myself involved with girls who cared more about themselves than me. It started with my very first girlfriend when I was a freshman in high school. My Mom would yell up the stairs to my bedroom to tell me she was on the phone. And each and every time, I rolled my eyes and dragged my feet to answer her call. For a solid hour, I would listen to her go on and on about everything under the sun (mostly her complaining about cheerleading practice!) Never once did she take a breath of air or ask a single thing about me. The one-sided conversation would have probably gone on longer if I didn’t cut her off at the 60 minute time limit, AKA my breaking point. Despite the fact that my family and all my friends hated her, I stuck with her. Not because I was that crazy about her either, but because I liked the fact I didn’t have to sweat over who I would take to the homecoming dance.

Even into my 20s, the pattern repeated itself. I once had a girl ask me what I did for a living. So, I told her I ran a Network Security Consulting company, but before I could get another word out, she cut me off. She proceeded to say… “Ugh! Don’t tell me anymore. I never understand tech stuff and I zone out the minute anyone starts talking about it.” Basically that’s like saying you don’t care what I do for 50+ hours a week with my life or where my interests, dreams, talents and passions lie. You aren’t interested in learning about me at all. Which I suppose in hindsight was fine, because it left such a bad taste in my mouth that I didn’t care to hear a single thing she had to say thereafter.

Over the years, I came to this conclusion: Women don’t really want to talk. They just want a guy to listen while they talk. And that’s who I became – the guy who’s a good listener. As a result, I’ve become pretty private with my life. I don’t pretend to be the most fascinating man on the planet. So, the lack of inquiry isn’t always a bad deal because there are days when I feel boring; mundane episodes when I didn’t do anything noteworthy or exciting enough to talk about.

Asking how someone’s day was is a great way to open up the lines of communication and to begin building a deeper connection. It’s more than just a polite question. You’re offering an ear to listen. And if they need it, a shoulder to lean on. When you show an interest in someone, you’re essentially saying “I want to be a part of your world, share it with me.” I cannot tell you how much the words “how was your day” mean to me. Just the question alone often leaves me speechless.

I’m grateful for 1000 Awesome Things, but what I’m most grateful for is someone showing me that I matter. That the time I spend on this earth matters. My day matters.

So to the first girl in my life to ever care enough to ask how my day was, I say thank you x1000.

Appreciative Revolutionary: David Stehle (@davidstehle)

Bio: David is the Founder of a Network Security Consulting company by day, and blogs at The Rest Is Still Unwritten by night. An amateur MMA fighter, snowboarder, sport bike racer, & lover of all things adrenaline rush related, he’s also a music junkie, a tech gadget whore, & proud Papa to a skateboarding Bulldog. Oh, & he kind of has a soft spot for the written word.

Favorite ice cream flavor: Ben & Jerry’s Chubby Hubby

I appreciate David’s unending love for his BFF, Diesel, and that despite his many sex-related tweets, he actually has a really big…heart! Seriously though, you’re incredibly lucky if he counts you among his friends!

Who knew that I would be inspired by the film Hot Tub Time Machine? Usually you can tell how good a film will be based on its title. If a film’s title gives away the entire plot, it’s usually not a good thing.

No Country For Old Men: Good film

Snakes On A Plane: Bad Film

The Hurt Locker: Great Film

Dude Where’s My Car? : Terrible Film

Get my drift? Anyways, Hot Tub Time Machine was actually not that bad of a film, I mean it got a 7.2 out of 10 on IMDB.

The film touches upon an important theme that I didn’t expect: appreciating your friends.

In the film, Adam (John Cusack), Nick (Craig Robinson), and  Lou (Rob Corddry) play three friends that fell out of touch and come back together as a unit thanks to, you guessed it, a Hot Tub Time Machine. The trio relives their glory days and become closer to each other in the process.

Lucky for me, I don’t need a time machine to appreciate friendship.

When I was an Orientation Leader in college, we had week-long training sessions prior to move-in day for new students. At the end of the week, we all filled out pages in a scrapbook. I had so much fun bonding with my new friends that I took up two pages writing “Why I love my Orientation Leaders.” For each OL, I wrote a reason why I loved him or her.

I was showing my appreciation through those scrapbook pages, but could have I taken it a step further? Think about the difference between saying and doing. Forget about saying you appreciate someone, how can you show it?

Social Media has made it easier for us to stay in touch with our friends. Now staying in touch is a simple “Happy Birthday” on their day of birth, or clicking ‘like’ on a funny status message- all actions I support and do myself. Bu,t how can we build upon that?

Sometimes you also need to move the interaction offline as well. That’s why I am always asking my DC friends out to lunch or happy hour- you gotta get the face time in when things get quiet. Sometimes you have to put the social back into Social Media.

It doesn’t matter how you keep in touch.  The bottom line is: take a moment to think about your friends and let them know you care.

So, I challenge you to think about the friends in your life right now- I bet you know someone who you haven’t talked to in a while. Take a minute to send them an e-mail, or schedule a lunch, and you won’t need a time machine to roll back the time lost on those you appreciate the most.

Appreciative Revolutionary: Patrick Pho (@dmbosstone)

Bio: Patrick has been blogging before it was called blogging (since age 15). He writes about Gen-Y, Social Media, and how it’s rocking his world. Patrick’s stories, rants, and opinions have been featured in The Washington City Paper and The Washington Express. In 2009, he earned a blogger of the year nomination from Brazen Careerist. Patrick has also been a contributor to sports websites 4 Sport Boston and GoGameFace.

Favorite ice cream flavor: Banana

I appreciate Patrick’s Bostonian roots, his genuine personality, and the determination with which he has taken on the quarter life crisis!

The moment I read the words, “Nothing is either good or bad, but thinking makes it so,” while reading Hamlet in high school, my life changed.  It changed because it surfaced to my consciousness that we all have the power to control the way we perceive virtually everything that happens to us (I say virtually because there are some things that will be devastating to us no matter how positive we try to be).  This was eye-opening, because I had traveled through my youth thinking that external factors really controlled how we felt. I was generally always a happy person, but when something bad happened, I often felt like I didn’t have much control over it, and I just had to wait until it passed.

But, this simple idea had a profound impact on me because it made me see that, if you make an effort to be self-aware and conscious of what you are experiencing, you can influence how you experience every moment in life. We can choose to view things with the dark sunglasses of negativity, or some sweet shades of positivity.  The only real question is which pair will we decide put on in the moment.

This mind shift can have a massive impact on how happy we are. However, sometimes it can be a hard habit to cultivate because it only really works if it is done on a daily basis and that is what motivated me to create FiveDailyGratitudes.com, an online community gratitude journal that helps people integrate the power of gratitude into their life by providing a quick and easy way to list five things you are thankful for each day.

Why I first started FiveDailyGratitudes.com
People usually write daily gratitudes in a paper journal, but I wanted a method that I could do from anywhere in the world. I didn’t want to forget to write them down on paper, or forget my journal somewhere. So, I decided to start the website to list my five daily gratitudes each day.

However, I quickly realized that this was something that could benefit many other people, especially during today’s anxious economic times where it is easy to focus on all of the current negativity. So, I decided to do a little psychological experiment: I opened up the site, so anyone can share the things they are thankful for on a given day.

Over the past year, hundreds have signed up, and while not everyone lists their five daily gratitudes publicly (some simply like getting the daily email reminder with my own five daily gratitudes), tons of people have written me saying they write them down on their own, and that it has made a huge difference in their lives. I am so appreciative that I can share this simple tool with everyone and that it is making a difference in peoples’ lives.

Now, to the Psychology of It All
Why is it important to integrate gratitude and appreciation into our life? UC Davis psychologist Robert Emmons points out, “The evidence that cultivating gratefulness is good for you is overwhelming. Gratitude is quality that we should aspire to as a part and parcel of personal growth…Specifically, we have shown that gratitude is positively related to such critical outcomes as life satisfaction, vitality, happiness, self-esteem, optimism, hope, empathy, and willingness to provide emotional and tangible support for other people, whereas being ungrateful is related to anxiety, depression, envy, materialism, and loneliness.

Collectively, such studies present credible evidence that feeling grateful generates a ripple effect through every area of our lives, potentially satisfying our deepest yearnings – our desire for happiness, our pursuit of better relationships, and our ceaseless quest for inner peace, wholeness, and contentment. Gratitude is more, through than a tool for self-improvement. Gratitude is a way of life.”

But, it is important that we make it a daily habit. Emmons has demonstrated in his research, “The important thing is to establish the daily habit of paying attention to gratitude-inspiring events; a daily regimen is what is required. The act of writing them down translates your thoughts into words. Psychological research has shown that translating thoughts into concrete language – words, whether oral or written – had advantages over just thinking the thoughts. Writing helps to organize thoughts and facilitate integrating, and also helps you accept your own experiences and put them in context. In essence, it allows you to see the meaning of events going on around you and create meaning in your own life.”

What should you be grateful for?
This is up to you. Occasionally, it will be big things like getting a new job, a promotion, or completing a new project. However, most of the time, you can list smaller things like getting a good night’s sleep, watching the sunrise reflect off your wall, talking to a good friend the night before, enjoying an article in a magazine, eating at your favorite restaurant, or enjoying how good you feel after a morning shower. The key is to be mindful of everything that is good in your life – be it big or small – and making a conscious effort to increase your awareness about this gratefulness.

I can’t think of five things to be grateful for!
At first you may feel self-conscious when you first start writing out five daily gratitudes. It may even be a bit difficult to come up with five, but it will get easier and easier the more often you do it. I actually thought about only listing three, but I want us to push ourselves a bit so we can be mindful and make a conscious effort to discover things we can be grateful for on even the most ordinary of days. If it was too easy, it would not bring enough meaning and impact into our lives, so five is a good goal to shoot for.  If you want to learn more about how you can get started using Five Daily Gratitudes, visit the Get Started section.

Appreciative Revolutionary: Marcos Salazar (@MarcosSalazar)

Bio: Marcos Salazar is a psychology and leadership researcher for the Girl Scouts Research Institute within Girl Scouts of the USA. He is also the author of The Turbulent Twenties Survival Guide and a speaker on the psychology of life after college, Gen Y, and Millennial topics. He is a certified leadership coach, an entrepreneur (he owns a few hyperlocal clothing stores focused on New York City and Washington, DC), and is about to release his first iPhone app based on FiveDailyGratitudes.com. Connect with him at www.MarcosSalazar.com.

Favorite ice cream flavor: Ciao Bella Blackberry Cabernet Sorbetto

I appreciate Marcos’ incredible commitment to gratitude and his desire to get the most out of life!

How do you appreciate the people in your life?  Often times, we only show our appreciation after they’ve done something for us, or when another holiday mandated by Hallmark appears on the calendar. We send the obligatory thank-you cards after birthdays and celebrations, and maybe even pony up for a Borders gift card when someone has helped us out in a pinch.

When etiquette isn’t driving us, how often do we show people that we appreciate them for who they are and what they mean to us?  Words can’t always do our feelings justice, and coming up with the right words can be a struggle in and of itself.

When I was younger, I was often tasked with the chore of pulling weeds in my mom’s flower gardens.  I hated it.  We’re not talking about a little bed of tulips here – many of the plants are so big you could lose a small child in the shade garden.  I’d get around to doing it…eventually…but as soon as the job was done, I high-tailed it out of there.

A few years ago, I made a spur of the moment decision to help my mom out with one of her major spring gardening projects.  She didn’t ask me to do it – but, when she came home from the greenhouse with an entire SUV of fledging plants, I thought it would be a fun chance to spend some time with her and participate in one of the activities that she truly loves (even though I’d hardly consider myself a green thumb).  Two days and roughly 200 plants later, she could cross a huge to-do off her list, and I’d discovered that I actually enjoy digging around in the dirt.  Every year since then, I’ve made it a point to block off a weekend in May to channel my inner Martha Stewart with my mom.

We live in a time-starved culture that teaches us from an early age to approach life with a “what’s in it for me” attitude.   This in mind, the ultimate act of appreciation is to spend time with someone doing whatever it is that they enjoy – whether or not it falls on your list of favorite activities

It’s not begrudgingly going to a concert with your girlfriend only after she’s pestered you for months, or agreeing to go to your brother’s favorite sporting event only if he’ll pay for your ticket.  It’s proactively planning an afternoon bike trip because with your boyfriend because he loves to ride – even though more than half an hour on the trail makes your calves feel like jelly.

Do this without expecting anything in return, even if showing your appreciation requires you to dress up as a video game vixen and wander around a gaming convention for hours.  Check your ego and sense of pride at the door, and get caught up in the moment, because chances are you’ll have much more fun than you’d ever expected.    Even if you’d rather be sitting on a hill of fire ants, suck it up, put on a smile, and remember that you’re doing this without an ounce of self-interest.

Creating memories is an enduring and truly meaningful way to show your appreciation.  No one will remember a card 20 years from now, but they will remember the time you spent together doing what they love.

Appreciative Revolutionary: Ellen Nordahl (@ellelamode)

Bio: Ellen Nordahl works as a Recruiter for a medical software company in Madison, Wisconsin.  She loves to meet new people, travel, read, and spend time outdoors.  When not ogling fashion blogs, playing Bananagrams or compiling the perfect playlist, she blogs about life, career, and other topics that strike her fancy at ElleLaMode.com.  Keep tabs on her @ElleLaMode on Twitter.

Favorite ice cream flavor: Espresso Oreo

I appreciate Ellen’s passion, her inquisitive nature, and how much she values her family!

I am a people person. I love talking to others, interacting in person, online, over the phone, whatever. I love making people laugh, talking about my day, and listening to others share as well.

Those of you who know me already know how outgoing I am. Even in kindergarten, I started getting report cards that said, “Ashley is a bright little girl, but she is too social.” This report card trend continued until I reached the age where it was a lost cause to tell my parents I talk a lot…as it was clear they already knew.

I doubt I shocked anybody when I decided to join a sorority in college. 100+ new friends? Yes, please! My freshman year I made what seemed like a million new friends living in an all-girls dorm at The University of Kansas. My sophomore and junior years, I lived in the sorority house with about 80 women. My senior year I lived in a 13 bedroom house with 12 sorority sisters.

My point is that I’ve surrounded myself with people my whole life. I have an amazing support system of family and friends, and I’ve always either lived with them or spent my free time with them. Needless to say, I never had much alone time until I graduated college. I was totally okay with this, until I realized that I didn’t know who I was on my own. I knew exactly who I was when 20 of my closest friends and family were within earshot all day, every day, but that didn’t matter unless I knew who I was without all of the noise.

I spent 22 years of my life relying on others to make me happy. I never just took the time to figure out how I could make myself happy. Maybe I was maturing, but all of a sudden, the girl with 12 roommates was insisting on living alone after graduation.

Now, once again, those of you who know me know that I actually moved back in with my parents after graduation. In fact, I just moved out of their house last week. But, the point is that I knew that’s what I needed. Sure, it was comfortable for me to have someone to come home to every day, but I realized that I cannot rely on someone else to make me happy.

It’s okay to be alone. In fact, it’s great to be alone! I’m a young, very independent woman, with the rest of my life to live with other people, assuming I get married and/or have kids some day. So, of course I appreciate my family and my friends for always being there for me, but right now, I cherish my alone time more than anything else, and I can finally say that I know exactly who I am.

Appreciative Revolutionary: Ashley Campbell (@_Ashley_Nicole_)

Bio: I am a twenty four year old Kansas City native currently freelancing as a social media marketer & copywriter. I consider myself, first and foremost, a philanthropist, as nonprofits are my real passion. I love to write, talk, laugh, learn, observe, cook & play. My blog chronicles some of my own entry level observations as a young professional navigating my new career. I appreciate Sam for her friendship and ability to remind those around her to be thankful.

Favorite ice cream flavor: Ben & Jerry’s Chunky Monkey

I appreciate Ashley’s sincerity, her zest for life, and her positive energy!

The ultimate authority must always rest with the individual’s own reason and critical analysis.
Dalai Lama

Last night, my wife and I watched the documentary ‘Lord: Save Us From Your Followers’ (which I absolutely highly recommend, by the way. It’s on-demand on Netflix).

The documentary was written and produced by Dan Merchant, who is Catholic.  Merchant travels around and tries to do something that is novel in the United States: Have a discussion / healthy debate about religion.

I always appreciate a healthy debate, whether it be about religion, sports, education, or the topic of your choice.

The problem with healthy debate is it requires you to, not only have a position on a topic, but also hear out the other side (side note: hearing out does not mean believing in it yourself).

Debate opens our eyes and our ears to topics and viewpoints we would have otherwise ignored.  It allows you to broaden your horizons and hear exactly why someone else believes in what they believe, without being preached at or converted (because that is NOT debate).

Living abroad, I was taught to avoid any discussions of American views, for fear of getting into a bad situation. Instead, I embraced talk of why non-Americans felt the way they did about our country, and learned quite a lot from my debates and discussions.

We are taught early on to avoid discussion on religion, politics, race and other hot-button topics in our society for fear of offending others.  Isn’t it ironic the topics which we are taught to avoid are the ones that cause the greatest divide?  If we were all more open about these topics, we’d learn a lot about each other and a lot about ourselves as well.

Educate yourself, take a stance, think critically, and then seek out others who oppose your view, and learn from them.

I appreciate those who disagree with me, who challenge me to learn more about myself by engaging in discussions that challenge my beliefs and make me a better person.

The next time you meet someone who has an opposite viewpoint, take the time to engage them in some healthy debate and discussion. You may be surprised what you learn.

Appreciative Revolutionary: Ryan Knapp (@ryanknapp)

Bio: Ryan Knapp is the founder and director of buffalofutsal where he gives everyone the opportunity to create memories by playing the beautiful game. When he’s not playing soccer, he’s probably our for a swim, a bike or a run.  Follow him and connect with him at www.ryanjknapp.me.

Favorite ice cream flavor: Birthday Cake Remix

I appreciate Ryan’s kind heart and his positive attitude and outlook on life!

In the past five years, I’ve seen and experienced with some of my friends and family who have struggled or who are struggling with health issues or a physical impairment. I truly admire their strength, courage and passion for life, their accomplishments. Even though it’s not as easy as someone who is completely healthy and has their legs, they are determined not to give up.

We all experience friends or family with these circumstances and bless those who haven’t. Even I have struggled with health issues. So bad, that I was diagnosed with Crohn’s disease six years ago. Crohn’s disease is a chronic inflammatory disease of the intestines. It primarily causes ulcerations (breaks in the lining) of the small and large intestines, which, if not taken care of, may become colon cancer.

Since I was diagnosed, I’ve changed my diet, my daily routine, and tried to be stress free so it won’t flare up. It requires a lot of dedication and will power. Believe me, there are so many things I love but can’t eat!! Overall, these experiences made me think how grateful I am for being healthy now, for my body and everything that comes with it. I definitely look at the bright side. It could be worse. I could have had the colon cancer if I had not taken care of it earlier.

Unfortunately, there are many occurrences in life that are not even worth appreciating. At least not at first glance, but when you look under the surface you can see that all events serve a bigger purpose. It’s all about perspective, and if you observe carefully enough, you will see the gift in everyone and everything in life; even if the gift is just realizing how to be more forgiving and kind.

My body is one out of many important things I am grateful for and appreciate in life. I love every single thing about it and I’m grateful for it being whole. It’s just a wonderland! It’s my temple, and I need to take care of it. Just every scar, every freckle, every corner, it’s amazing.

I am grateful for….

Hands that let me caress my pup’s soft fur. They let me smear off the sad or happy tears of a loved one or friend, write a letter to someone across the state, send e-mails, blog, and even create this post.

Arms that let me give out a warm hug on a tough day, or even snuggle with those I care about and love.

Eyes that let me see the sparkling stars at night, the rays of sunshine peeking through wispy clouds, an amazing mountain view, see your loved ones grow, look deeply into someone’s eyes as you see your reflection, a breathtaking sunset or even a football game; just the beauty that is everywhere.

Ears that let me listen to birds chirping, a friend’s voice, infectious laughter, and kind, heartwarming words.

A nose that lets me smell the flowers in my neighbor’s garden, the irresistible cologne that your significant other wears, fresh air, homemade food.

A voice that lets me express my feelings, state my opinions, let me tell a bedtime story, sing in the shower, say I love you.

Lips that let me feel the anticipation of a kiss.

Legs that let me run a mile, ride a bike, take my dog for a walk, drive, jump.

A heart that lets me know I am alive by each beat it makes, gets in the way of a decision I am trying to make, lets me know when I love someone or something.

I am grateful to be able to feel the warm summer day and the cool gentle breeze; for a quiet, peaceful, fully functional, healthy brain. It’s amazing when you grasp an attitude of appreciation, you become bigger than the barriers you are confronted with, and you find ways to admire all aspects of your life. (Believe me, I learned the hard way.) Plus, the more you concentrate on what you appreciate, the more you attract positive experiences into your life to further appreciate. Go ahead, try it.

Appreciative Revolutionary: Cheila Esquilin (@RdGarnet)

Bio: My name is Cheila. I was born in Bronx, NY and raised in the beautiful island of Puerto Rico throughout my pre-adulthood; currently living in the suburbs of Baltimore, MD. I am a hopelessly realistic woman with a great imagination and creativity. A chicken wings eating, Summertime loving, No bull-sh*#@ having, Vodka drinking, Sports freak addict.

I consider my blog my online home. It’s a haphazard accumulation of my random thoughts, my achievements; a way to express every line/word in an unalloyed, unadulterated, undiluted matter. It’s just a little slice of me; pouring my thoughts through these standard lines.

Favorite ice cream flavor: Butter Crunch w/strawberry topping of course from Friendly’s

I appreciate Cheila’s incredible strength and maturity, and her zest for life!

This isn’t easy for me to say, but…

Thank you.   I love you.

Well, not you directly.  I may not even know you.  And it would be awful presumptuous of me to say such a thing, given the early stages of our relationship.  Besides, it’s a pretty one-way conversation that’s going on right now, so I have no idea how you feel about me.  So, let’s dispense with the awkwardness, and get rid of that cringe-worthy premature sentence there.

I love you.

Wait, what?

Believe it or not, it’s easier for some people to say the “three little words” than the two casual ones, or even the one quick one (if you’re a fan of a simple “thanks”).  I had a roommate once who never thanked anyone, even when he needed a ride to the hospital.  He got better, though.  He now thanks people regularly.

The problem in giving appreciation to someone is that by thanking them, we are acknowledging that they did something for us.  Whether it’s a favor, a compliment, or even something as simple as holding the door, we’re showing gratitude for something that they did that we ourselves could not provide.

Thanking someone means swallowing your pride and accepting defeat.

But, this isn’t a bad thing.  Groups, tribes, societies, cultures, flocks, herds, whatever – they’re all based on the group being more powerful than any individual member.  Without his peons, a king is nothing.  Without their fans, a celebrity is nothing.  Without the contributions of others, we are nothing.

So, if you’re one of those people who has a hard time saying thanks, just consider it your duty as a member of the world at large.  You’re helping to strengthen the bonds of society and modern culture.

And hey, it’s only two words.  It’s not like you’re telling them that you love them or anything.

Appreciative Revolutionary: Andrew Weitsman (@aweitsman)

Bio: Andrew Weitsman would like to thank you for reading his guest post. And also would like to thank Sam for inviting him to post it. Seriously, you guys, she’s awesome.

Anyway, Andrew is a professional blogger and entrepreneur who has a tendency to do silly things and go off on odd tangents.  If you want to read more of Andrew’s stuff, head over to his blog where he provides occasional wisdom, tips, larfs and other goodies several times a week.

Favorite ice cream flavor: I once had this really good ice cream at a place that was by my house as a kid that was actually a frankenstein-like combo of whatever they’d made too much of or had left over.  It was delicious.  Sadly, that place is no longer around, so either French vanilla or mint chocolate chip.

I appreciate Andrew’s creativity and imagination, his enthusiasm, and his “dedication“ to writing!

I went to the same school for 13 years before college. The same people were there, day in and day out, and every “first day of school” was really a strong feeling of déjà vu. I was in the middle – not popular, and not a loser; comfortable in my situation, while still having the occasional pangs of wanting to be liked, and the teenage angst and embarrassment of my family.

Going to college in my hometown of New York City was eye opening – and it changed me forever. The independence that I gained made me realize a lot of my dreams and goals – but at the same time, I reached that point where you start to question who you are. Everyone around me was rich and powerful, and I was just – there; going to school, working for money, volunteering, and trying to figure life out. I didn’t always appreciate the things that lay in front of me.

My parents were taking out loans to help me pay for school. I was living well beyond my means, eating sushi and taking cabs every night, and I just attributed it to playing a part. I wasn’t being myself – at least not in my truest sense. I didn’t write a lot, I didn’t spend a lot of time taking care of myself, and I was most concerned with what others thought about me. It seemed my life in a 13 year bubble had taken its’ toll on my ability to adapt. Without that previous life, I had no real sense of who I was.

I struggled with depression for a really long time – throughout high school and college, and even into my years after. It was really difficult. Throughout the process, I was probably really difficult to deal with. I didn’t really appreciate anyone, and focused on myself (as depressed people tend to do…). One time, my mother came to the City to spend some time with me, and I decided it was more important to basically do anything but spend time with her. To put it short: I was a hot mess.

Over time – and through a combination of many different things – including running, my husband, friends, and other support, I have been inspired to appreciate things in everyday life.  I have made sure that this list always includes myself. It is crucial to appreciate those people, places, and things in life that have gotten you where you are – but I’ve found it just as valuable to appreciate yourself. You are pretty awesome, and without your own support of yourself, it’s hard to feel good and appreciate the rest of the things in your life.

Appreciation is something I have learned about the challenging way – but I think it’s something I am continuing to learn each day. It’s about thanking people for showing you the good in you.

Appreciative Revolutionary: Beth Oppenheim-Chan (@boppenheimchan)

Bio:  Beth is  a 25 year old nonprofit professional working in DC, but a New Yorker from birth. She is really interested in international development and saving the world. She is also interested in the fact that being in your twenties is way harder than anyone ever told you they would be.  She loves to write, read other people’s writing, and just explore her many career thoughts and options…as they keep multiplying, one by one.

Favorite ice cream flavor: Ben & Jerry’s Magic Brownies

I appreciate Beth’s honesty, her determination, and most of all, her friendship!