Appreciation is as tough to receive as it is to give.
The truth is that as much as we need to give appreciation to those in our lives, we also need to accept it graciously and happily. Like any compliment or praise, we are conditioned to blow everything off with a shrug or excuse. Perhaps it is because we are shy or embarrassed, don’t feel worthy of the thanks, or maybe it is just simply because we do not know how to properly handle appreciation.
Ladies, I have an unfortunate truth as well. We are the worst offenders. Like any conversation that begins with the phrase, “do these jeans make my butt look big,” appreciation is a dangerous place for our guys to venture. Sure, they know when they do something wrong that flowers are in order…if they do something REALLY wrong, then it should be something pretty and shiny.
Yet with appreciation, they just can’t seem to “do it right.” If they say something nice, we frequently question their motives. If they make a gesture, then it isn’t the right gesture or big enough. Guys are not always the romantic sentimental grand scheming leading men we see on Girls Night Out at the movies. Sometimes they show appreciation by doing things you don’t even REALIZE is appreciation, like folding your laundry the exact way you want it while watching a news show that drives you up a wall.
I should also note that “Dinner tonight was good…so much better than the last time you tried to make *insert culinary masterpiece that would make Julia envious here*” is their way of saying, “This dinner was amazing, thank you for all the work you put into it, and I am so lucky to have a girl as creative and talented and hot as you.”
Of course, there is the notion that maybe guys should learn to GIVE appreciation better. However, after millions of years of genetic conditioning, I have a feeling that we might need to learn to co-exist with our male counterparts in the same way that we needed to adapt to other species of life, or that really weird Goth chick we somehow ended up roommates with our freshman year of college.
We’ve been telling guys for years that they need to get more in touch with their feminine side, perhaps it is time for us to get more in touch with our masculine side. Most of the guys I surveyed, in fact, wished that they could just catch a break when they were trying to be nice!
So, the next time a guy is trying to show his love/thanks/appreciation, here are some quick and easy ways to say “thank you” graciously:
• “I’m glad you enjoyed it.”
• “That means a lot to me.”
• “I’m flattered you think so.”
There is also my personal favorite that works for either gender, but it’s super difficult and complicated. Ready? This is earth shattering…
When someone shows you appreciation, smile and genuinely say, “Thank you.”
How do you receive appreciation in your life? Is it gracious, back-handed or a downright act of Congress?
Photo Credit: Medioimages
Appreciative Revolutionary: Elisa Doucette
Bio: Elisa is a not-so-average girl next door who writes various musings and ramblings about the beautiful disaster that is her life over at Ophelia’s Webb. If she’s not out having really good conversation with friends over cups of coffee or pints at the local pub, she’s most likely curled up with a book listening to jazz or catching the latest Pats/Sox/Celtics/*Insert Kick Ass Sporting Team* game.
Favorite Ice Cream Flavor: Hood Red Sox “Peanut Butter Nation”
I appreciate Elisa’s BlogCrush series for her beautifully written tributes and the recognition she gives to deserving bloggers, and of course, her dedication to the best sports teams around!
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