We’ve all had days when we wake up on the wrong side of the bed. Nothing goes right, and we’re stuck in a funk. It’s like we have a dark cloud following us around with the constant threat of rain. These are the days when life just sucks.
There are certainly times when we’re truly going through hell, dealing with the tough stuff and totally within our right to feel sadness and despair (to a point of course). But, what about the rest of the time? I’ll be the first to admit that there have been times I’ve wallowed in self pity for no reason at all. A few little things go wrong, and the funk descends. You can probably see the negative energy I’m emitting.
In my more mature moments, I force myself to stop and think about what’s going on and how I’m reacting to it. Am I making a big deal out of nothing? Have I started a domino effect by responding so strongly to the first “bad” thing that happened? This, my friends, is called perspective. It’s so easy to use, and yet we don’t use it enough, because it’s probably easier to wallow. Try this:
1) Think about what’s bothering you. Force yourself to answer honestly: Are you making a big deal out of something small?
2) Ask yourself, will your stewing, brooding, and general grumpiness contribute in any way to solving the problem?
3) Have your negative vibes infiltrated every part of your life? What kind of impact are they having?
4) Take a deep breath, and put the situation in perspective. Consider this: It could always be worse.
If you need help with the perspective part, here’s a story for you: On Saturday, I was watching TV with my dad when he got a phone call. It was the answering service at the temple (he’s a rabbi), and someone had left a message about a family who was in the emergency room and asking for a rabbi. Several calls later, it was midnight, and he was on his way to the hospital. He arrived to find a 20-year-old boy lying face down on a couch in the waiting room. There had been a car accident earlier that evening involving the boys’ parents. His father had died and his mother was in critical condition, and it wasn’t looking good. Twenty years old, an only child, his life changed in an instant. He lost his father the day before father’s day. I don’t know what ended up happening to his mother, but doctors told my dad she’d lost a lot of blood, so I can only imagine.
Life isn’t perfect. Sometimes it can really suck. But, it’s so important to remember that life itself is a gift. You are alive and that is a beautiful thing. Whatever is going on in your life, no matter how difficult it may be, it could always be worse. Don’t wait until something horrible happens in your life to realize this. It’s okay to be sad sometimes, in fact, it’s healthy. You can stick your toes in the waters of sorrow as long as you don’t drown. Stop worrying so much about the long term. Take a look around and be grateful for what you have today.
Pingback: The Element of Surprise | Small Hands, Big Ideas