My grandfather is almost 90 years old. Over the past few months, he’s taken on a new philosophy: he’s going to do whatever he wants to do, he doesn’t care what anyone else says. It’s his life. In principle, there’s some wisdom here, but in practice, there’s a fine line to walk. In principle, my grandpa deserves to have an attitude like this. He’s 89 years old, he worked hard his whole life, and he’s always been a generous guy. I think what drove him to take this new “lease on life” was watching my grandma deteriorate as she suffered from Alzheimer’s. For the last year of her life, he took care of her, and watched the woman he loved fade away. Who can blame him for deciding to live for himself now that she’s gone?
Unfortunately, when it comes to putting this new theory into practice, my grandfather is on the wrong side of the fine line. He’s taken not caring what anyone else says way too far. He has turned it into dragging out all the dirty laundry he can, and as a result, alienating some of the people who love him the most.
Though I in no way agree with the practice, I commend my grandpa for having the courage to put himself first. It’s so easy to get caught up in the familiar and routine, remaining content with what is comfortable and reliable, afraid to fall short of expectations. How many of us have actually taken the time to stop and think:
Am I really happy?
Is this what I really want?
Have I been moving in a straight line on cruise control without checking to make sure I’m going in the right direction?
It seems like our lives could be compared to a game of Jenga. We figure out what we think we want and work towards getting it, until we can stack all of the pieces in order, each supporting the other, creating a perfect balance. No wonder we never stop and ask ourselves those questions. What if the answer to one of them was no? You know how Jenga works, you pull one piece out, and what was once a perfectly balanced tower, falls to the ground.
There’s one thing I’ve learned from my grandpa and his philosophy. I do not want to be 89 years old when I decide to start living for myself. I don’t want to look back on my life then and realize that I should have pulled a piece out a long time ago. We’re young, and we may have a lot going on in our lives, but there is no better time to sit back and look at the tower we’ve arranged so far. I admit, it seems really scary, but ask yourself those difficult questions, even though you might not like the answers, even if it means you might have to pull a piece out, let the tower fall, and start rebuilding again. Because, the longer you wait, the taller your tower will be, and the farther the pieces will fall.
